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- The Cynic: September 8
The Cynic: September 8
The Cynic
September 08, 2025
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BUSINESS
This Week’s Business News
Tesla’s U.S. market share just dropped to its lowest since 2017—because competition finally showed up.
Business Insider | Amazon CEO Andy Jassy
Tesla now holds just 50% of the U.S. EV market, down from 62% last year. The drop isn’t because people suddenly hate Teslas—it’s because they now have other options that don’t come with Twitter rants included.
Legacy automakers and new EV players are eating into Tesla’s lead by offering more price points, better build quality, and, in some cases, door handles that actually work.
Elon’s not panicking, but Wall Street’s watching. Because losing 12% of your market share in 12 months isn’t just a dip—it’s a vibe shift.
The SEC just closed its investigation into Swedbank—with no charges, just awkward silence.
REUTERS | Jeenah Moon
After years of poking around Swedbank’s alleged money laundering links, the SEC has decided to walk away quietly, bringing the U.S. probe to an anticlimactic end.
No fines, no penalties, just a polite handshake and a strong recommendation to keep the receipts next time. Swedbank’s shares rose on the news, mostly out of sheer relief.
Meanwhile, Europe’s financial regulators are still doing their own digging. Because nothing says “we’re handling it” like five years of meetings and zero indictments.
China wants to update its trade law—because tariffs are no longer subtle.
REUTERS | Hemanshi Kamani
Beijing is reviewing new rules that would make it easier to hit foreign goods with retaliatory tariffs, particularly if Chinese firms face “discrimination” abroad. This is diplomatic language for “your sanctions hurt our feelings.”
The draft revisions would allow China to escalate trade spats faster and more visibly, a sign that the gloves are off and the bureaucrats are caffeinated.
The timing’s no accident—it follows rising tensions with the U.S. and EU over tech exports, semiconductors, and who gets to monopolize the future.
REAL ESTATE
This Week’s Real Estate News
Mortgage rates finally dropped below 7%—but no one’s popping the bubbly just yet.
AFP | Getty Images
The average 30-year fixed mortgage dipped to 6.99%—a microscopic shift that feels huge only because we’ve all been living in interest-rate hell since 2022.
It’s the first time in five weeks that rates have fallen, and it comes as inflation data stays mostly steady and Fed whisperers start saying things like “maybe” and “soft landing.”
Still, affordability remains bleak, and the only people truly celebrating are refinance sales reps and Zillow-addicted couples in denial.
After four weeks of optimism, mortgage demand from buyers just took a nosedive.
Courtesy of Zuri Gardens
Even with slightly lower rates, applications for home purchase loans dropped 2.1%—a sign that buyers are still gun-shy about jumping into the world’s most expensive guessing game.
It’s not just rates—it’s prices, inventory, and the universal realization that a 2-bed starter home shouldn’t cost more than a liver transplant.
Demand for refinancing, on the other hand, is up 13%—because desperate times call for lower monthly payments and a temporary sense of control.
Industrial real estate demand just fell for the first time in 15 years—and that’s not just Amazon’s fault.
REUTERS | Sarah Meyssonnier
For the first time since the Great Recession, warehouse and industrial leasing activity declined year-over-year, signaling that the pandemic-era boom in “we need space for all this toilet paper” may finally be over.
High interest rates, bloated inventories, and a general return to normal-sized panic buying are dragging the sector down. Developers are slowing projects, and tenants are negotiating harder than a divorce lawyer on espresso.
It’s not a crash—it’s a slowdown. But for a sector that’s been sprinting for a decade, even walking feels suspicious.
“Reading The Cynic is like being handed a lit firework—painful, reckless… yet impossible to ignore.”
FUN
Riddle Me This
I bloom when optimism’s fed,
I wither when interest climbs.
You’re seduced by my listing—
Then vanished by your mutter’s hum.
What am I?
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ADVICE
This Week’s Business Advice
“Budgets aren’t optimism—they’re pen-written confessions of how much we’re lying to ourselves.”
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SPONSORSHIP
This Week’s Partner
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