The Cynic: March 28

BUSINESS
This Week’s Business News

Canada-U.S. Travel Falls Off a Cliff—Thanks for the Tariffs, Neighbor

On the latest episode in the ongoing saga of "How to Lose Friends and Alienate Neighbors," The Guardian reports a staggering 70% drop in flight bookings between Canada and the U.S., thanks to President Trump's tariff tantrums. It's almost as if slapping your closest ally with hefty tariffs and treating them like the 51st state doesn't foster goodwill.

Airlines are scrambling to adjust, with over 320,000 seats removed from trans-border flights through October 2025. The peak summer months are hit hardest, because who wouldn't want to vacation in a country that might detain you for existing? Speaking of which, the U.S. has been busy detaining travelers from allied nations on flimsy grounds, adding a delightful touch of unpredictability to any trip.

Canadian airlines are also feeling the love, canceling routes to U.S. destinations faster than you can say "trade war." Flair Airlines, for instance, has axed flights to Nashville, Las Vegas, and Palm Springs, citing a lack of demand. Air Canada is considering shifting capacity to more welcoming skies, because why stick around where you're not wanted?

In a heartwarming display of unity, Canadians are choosing to spend their travel dollars domestically or in countries that don't view them as adversaries. After all, nothing says "friendly neighbor" like tariffs, detentions, and veiled annexation threats. It's a masterclass in diplomacy—if the goal is to see how quickly you can erode a century-old friendship.

China’s Humanoid Robots Can Dance—but Still Need Training Wheels

Ah, the grand spectacle of China's humanoid robots captivating over a billion viewers. Because nothing says technological supremacy like a robot-conga line, dazzling viewers with its ability to mimic basic rhythm. Bravo, indeed.

China's industrial robot production reached 430,000 units in 2023, maintaining its position as the world's largest market for the 11th consecutive year. Impressive numbers, truly a heartwarming tale of quantity over quality. When it comes to humanoid robots, though, we might need to lower the pom-poms.

Despite the fanfare, China's humanoid robots are still playing catch-up. Or rather, they’re enthusiastically engaged in their favorite pastime: synchronized dependency on foreign components. With the U.S. potentially turning off the tech tap, China’s robots might become connoisseurs of still-life posing.

The government's ambitious 2025 target for mass production of humanoid robots is commendable, but ambition doesn't equate to capability. It's like aiming for the stars with a paper airplane. While Unitree Robotics slightly advances, the rest might be better suited for tap-dancing through a labor crisis.

In the meantime, the U.S. isn't sitting idle. American robotics companies have found the secret to keeping up: lobbying! Because nothing says 'technological breakthrough' like a good old-fashioned strategy meeting with policymakers.

So, while the world marvels at China's robotic performances, it's worth remembering that behind the curtain, the race for technological supremacy is far from over. In this race, it's not just about who can dance the best—I’m sorry, I mean, "move strategically"—but who can build a self-reliant tech ecosystem without the need for a foreign safety net.

Spending Up, Sentiment Down—Economy Now Fully Confused

The latest economic data is in, and it seems we're all invited to the grand masquerade ball of numbers. Consumer spending in February rose by 0.4%, a delightful rebound from January's 0.3% decline. But before we pop the champagne, let's not overlook the 0.4% increase in core inflation—the largest in over a year.

So, consumers are spending more, but prices are rising just as fast. It's like running on a treadmill set to "inflation mode"—you're moving, but not really getting anywhere. And let's not forget the backdrop of escalating trade tensions and tariffs, which are about as helpful to the economy as a lead balloon.

Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell even admitted that inflation is ticking up "partly in response to tariffs." Translation: the trade policies are about as effective as a screen door on a submarine.

Meanwhile, consumer sentiment is taking a nosedive, with a 12% drop in the University of Michigan's index. It seems the only thing rising faster than prices is public pessimism.

REAL ESTATE
This Week’s Real Estate News

HUD to Non-Citizens: No Mortgage for You, and Also We Don’t Track That

The Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) has once again donned its superhero cape, swooping in to "protect" the American Dream from the clutches of non-permanent residents. Starting May 25, 2025, these individuals will be barred from obtaining Federal Housing Administration (FHA) mortgages.

This policy shift targets groups like Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) recipients and those awaiting asylum decisions. The rationale? Their residency status is as stable as a house of cards in a wind tunnel, making them risky borrowers.

HUD Secretary Scott Turner, echoing the administration's hardline stance, declared that taxpayer-funded benefits should be reserved for those who "follow the rules."

Interestingly, while illegal immigrants have always been ineligible for FHA-backed loans, the actual number who managed to slip through the cracks remains a mystery. HUD admits it doesn't track this data.

So, in a move reminiscent of previous crackdowns on public housing access for illegal immigrants, the administration continues its quest to ensure that only the "right" people benefit from taxpayer-funded programs.

HUD's latest policy change is a bold step to address a problem it can't quantify, affecting individuals whose residency status is already precarious. But hey, at least it aligns with the administration's priorities, right?

California Housing Prices Drop Slightly, Still Wildly Unaffordable

California real estate—a realm where the only thing more inflated than home prices are the egos of those who set them. Let's dissect the latest saga of the Golden State's housing market, shall we?

The Mirage of Falling Prices

Reports suggest that California's housing prices are on a downward trajectory. San Francisco, for instance, is expected to see a 5.2% decline in home prices. Stockton isn't far behind with a projected 3.7% drop. But before you start celebrating, remember: a 5% discount on a million-dollar shack still leaves you with a $950,000 shack. Hardly a bargain.

Wildfires: Nature's Price Adjusters

The recent Los Angeles wildfires have added a new twist to the housing market. With damages exceeding $50 billion and insurers fleeing faster than residents, home values in high-risk areas are plummeting. Pacific Palisades, for example, saw a 16% drop in median sale prices after State Farm canceled most of its policies. It's almost as if building luxury homes in fire-prone areas wasn't the best idea.

The Exodus Continues

High living costs and the allure of remote work are driving Californians to seek greener (and cheaper) pastures. Cities like San Francisco and Sacramento are experiencing population declines as residents flee to states where "affordable housing" isn't an oxymoron. It's a classic case of voting with your feet—and your moving truck.

The Illusion of Affordability

Despite these so-called price drops, California's median home price remains a staggering $861,020 as of December 2024. Combine that with mortgage rates hovering around 7%, and the dream of homeownership becomes just that—a dream. But hey, at least you can still rent a closet for $3,000 a month.

In the grand theater of California real estate, the actors may change, but the script remains the same: sky-high prices, natural disasters, and a mass exodus of residents. So, if you're waiting for the market to become affordable, you might want to grab a comfortable chair. It could be a while.

NAR Says Listings Can Stay Hidden—Because Transparency Was Getting Annoying

The National Association of Realtors (NAR) has graced us with yet another policy change, this time allowing home sellers to delay sharing their listings online. Because, clearly, what the housing market needs right now is more opacity and fewer opportunities for buyers to find homes.

This new policy, set to be implemented by September 30, 2025, is a delightful twist in the ongoing saga of real estate transparency—or the lack thereof. Remember the "clear cooperation policy" that was supposed to make listings more accessible? Well, it seems the NAR has decided that clarity is overrated.

Critics argue that this move reduces transparency and limits buyer access to listings, potentially impacting home values and market information. But who needs an open market when you can have secretive, exclusive deals happening behind closed doors? After all, nothing says "fair market" like a select few having access to information while the rest are left in the dark.

And let's not forget the recent antitrust lawsuit that was conveniently dismissed without prejudice. It's almost as if the NAR is playing a game of Monopoly, where they own all the properties and the rest of us are just passing "Go" without collecting $200.

In the end, this policy change is a masterstroke in the art of obfuscation. By allowing private listings to flourish, the NAR ensures that the housing market remains as clear as mud, benefiting those in the know while leaving the average buyer to navigate a labyrinth of hidden deals and secret handshakes. Bravo, NAR. Bravo.

NEWS
This Week’s Headlines

Bizarre wasp preserved in amber flew among dinosaurs - CNN
A parasitic wasp that flew among dinosaurs had a Venus flytrap-like contraption on its abdomen that likely allowed it to inject eggs into insects it entrapped.

‘Adolescence’ Duo Stephen Graham and Hannah Walters on the ‘Possibility’ of Season 2, ‘Overwhelming’ Global Response and What’s Next for Their Company - Variety
Stephen Graham and Hannah Walters discuss the overwhelming reaction to the Netflix series and the possibility of bringing it back for a second season

Nintendo’s new system for sharing digital Switch games, explained - Ars Technica
“Virtual game cards” don’t require an Internet check-in after the initial loan.

Michigan resident dies of rabies after receiving donated organ - New York Post
A Michigan resident who received an organ transplant died after contracting rabies from the new organ, state health officials said.

FUN
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